Sheesh! This is my 4th go around with this (last child) and so you'd think I would become an expert by now. . .
Alas--I am MUCH OLDER and much more prone to nausea, panic attacks, extreme emotional overload, and SHEER TERROR!
Saturdays are the 'designated days' for my son and I to 'practice driving'. . . (well, HE'S the one practicing the driving part)---I'm practicing holding on to the dashboard and door handle for dear life, keeping my eyes OPEN WIDE, and head craning around on a perpetual pivot to spot vehicles, curbs, walls, sidewalks, pedestrians, pets, flag poles, and any other thing we could possibly hit--AND of course I'm practicing keeping my sanity and my swearing down to an ABSOLUTE MINIMUM!
I tell ya. . . dear ole' dad has it easy! He has somehow managed to just pay the car insurance each month and complain about the 'upkeep' on the cars---while I am in the WAR ZONE each and every week trying to keep little Billy from killing anyone including himself. . .
Oh--and don't let me get started on the TAKING OF THE ACTUAL TEST!
That is another can of worms that I dare not open at this time. . . Suffice it to say that little Billy's older brother, Bobby not only had to take his WRITTEN permit test TWICE--he ended up taking the WRITTEN exam to get the actual driver's license THREE TIMES--and the DRIVING PART of the test TWICE! (that should have been a clue that maybe he just wasn't cut out for driving) This fact was certainly drilled home when Bobby ended up totaling his older brother's car while taking his buddys out for a 'spin'. . . He didn't get three miles from the driveway before mayhem hit. . . (and let's not even tally what the OLDEST brother did to his sweet lil' mom's car after HE learned to drive. . .)
Soooo. . .what the SNOT am I thinking? Do I even dare go through this again? Somebody give me STRENGTH!
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